Weaponized News — “I’m Telling My Kids This Is Government” Black & White Satire Tee

Description

This garment-dyed tee carries a dry, dark humor that lands without shouting. A relaxed, midweight cotton tee printed with a black-and-white photo of a robed figure standing in a candlelit pentagram and the line “I’m Telling My Kids this is Government.” It feels like a late-night joke shared between friends — a little ironic, a little conspiratorial. Wear it to low-key shows, after-work hangs, or weekend errands when you want to spark a conversation without trying too hard. The soft, garment-dyed fabric drapes and ages gently, so the shirt becomes more lived-in and comfortably familiar over time. It’s for people who appreciate subtle satire, vintage-inspired tones, and clothing that tells a story on its own.

Product features
– 100% ring-spun US cotton, medium weight (6.1 oz/yd²) for durable comfort
– Garment-dyed after construction for a soft, worn-in color and texture
– Relaxed fit with pre-shrunk fabric and double-needle stitched seams for long-lasting wear
– Tubular (no side seams) construction for a cleaner look and reduced fabric waste
– Available S–4XL (select partners) with 58 color options and sewn-in label

Care instructions
– Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)
– Do not bleach
– Tumble dry: low heat
– Iron, steam or dry: low heat
– Do not dryclean